Well, I suppose you are all waiting with bated breath to hear about my dinner date with the Professor. It was entirely lovely, except for one part.
You see, after dinner, I had a hankering for gum or a mint. I had noticed a basket of mints in the bathroom. I mentioned the mints, and like a gentleman, the Professor went to procure one for me. As soon as he left the table, the waitress brought the check. Now, I knew that the Professor intended to pay. But some perverse - I mean utterly, utterly PERVERSE - part of me thought, "Wouldn't it be funny if he came back, and I'd paid the check?" So I did.
Funny? I am a FLIPPING IDIOT. The check was $91 with tip. Why did I do that? Am I such a man hater that I can't allow them even the pleasure of chivalry? Am I some sort of financial masochist? Was the expression of bewilderment worth $91? Is there any expression the human face can make that's worth $91?
You see, after dinner, I had a hankering for gum or a mint. I had noticed a basket of mints in the bathroom. I mentioned the mints, and like a gentleman, the Professor went to procure one for me. As soon as he left the table, the waitress brought the check. Now, I knew that the Professor intended to pay. But some perverse - I mean utterly, utterly PERVERSE - part of me thought, "Wouldn't it be funny if he came back, and I'd paid the check?" So I did.
Funny? I am a FLIPPING IDIOT. The check was $91 with tip. Why did I do that? Am I such a man hater that I can't allow them even the pleasure of chivalry? Am I some sort of financial masochist? Was the expression of bewilderment worth $91? Is there any expression the human face can make that's worth $91?
posted by Jean Luc Petard at
6:59 PM
4 Comments:
I would not be so sure that you are an idiot. That could have been an extremely wily ploy to make the guy think, 'wow, what a cool chick, she totally paid the bill without automatically expecting me to pony up just cause I'm the guy, what a refreshing lack of sense of entitlement' followed quickly by 'oh shit, I bet she thinks that I volunteered to go get the mint so that I'd be in the bathroom when the check came and now she thinks I'm One of Those Guys who pulls some lame move on the first date, and I bet she's just glad now that I didn't whip out the Aunt Jemima impressions,' followed, naturally, by him feeling like he absolutely has to take you out on another date to an even fancier place, determined that he shall pay this time. I think you're going to come out ahead.
By
Dr Yakalumpf, PhD, at 9:00 PM
Also, let me note that, personally, I would decline a mint that came from the men's room. I mean, ew.
By
Dr Yakalumpf, PhD, at 9:00 PM
yeah, maybe he'll invite you out for a 'fancy pants' dinner. those are the best type :)
i agree w/ Dr Y: a mint from the men's room does not sound like a very good idea, even if they were hermetically sealed men's room mints.
By
Dr Chompers, Ph.D, at 9:13 PM
I will add my voice to the chorus of "No, for the love of Pete. Do not eat the food that has been anywhere near the toilet!"
I saw some made up, but scary, statistic about loose restaurant mints. Ew.
By
c1150, at 9:09 AM
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